make revolutions in your heart and mind

smash break and snap in two. what the hell? think of the rhythm, the pure beat and backbone to the art. insane and love and music and tattoos and piercings and person underneath it all.

dom's left the band.

what? huh? no! noooooooooo! snap out. life is life is life and people move on. good on ya. may life and love and prosperity see you throughout your days.

i don't listen to doosu. who is this todd anyway?

snap back. cross that bridge when we come to it.

a two brownie day with no physics and a desire to write and write and write and then look back at what was written and then write some more. life isn't tainted, at least not this week, at least not so far. anticipation and aggravation and letting it all float away in the warm sunlight and comforting riffs.

sexy and smooth and warm breezy nights, stars and not a care in the world. this song sounds so sexy. the kind of song you listen to a new cd one time through and the track stays in your head. a swaying salsa hips in a slow vibe.

what is this relaxedness. it feels so nice to the chest and neck and wrist. gliding on my skin and the tip of my tongue. better than brownies because i don't want myself to have chocolate or sugar. like coffee or a glass of cold milk. smooth fluid texture, pleasing chill taste.

if paint were my medium i'd want warm colors. warm and swaying and soft swirls. it looks like the rays of sun and the changes of color. i want to be able to paint a picture of an emotion so i can look back on it and say that's what it looks and feels like. do you remember? be the painting and fall back into the lifetime.

like not wanting to be someone else. a wall of paintings. books of words. you can point and say this is me. look around you, this is me. how awesome would that be.

is this feeling what it means to be high on life.

hold on to it as long as i can. little things throw me off, but not today. be in the moment. be in the life.

i want to paint a mask of stars and moons, on blue and black ground, with sunburst and metal and lotus petals. silver spirals and this feeling of serenity. but is that me. i don't know if i'd be lying. that is me right now. i change with my moods and thoughts and feelings. who knows who i'll be next wednesday. i had a vision of a mask with razor blade cuts, but i don't know if i'm artistic enough to own that. tears and scars and black and rain and locks with no keys, self imposed chains that are a part of my skin. what now. it changes so readily i seldom get a chance to reflect objectively. i want to do both, do both and right now.

i haven't seen motivation in months. feels good. i want to write and create.

it's coming. i can feel it coming. don't let me lose it. please i can't go back there. please. this feels so good.

i'm writing something and it feels so good. i don't know which way worked it, but i want this lifetime to last forever.

i wish someone could see me right now.