those eyes, part 2

so yeah here i am thinking about it again.

and the really crappy thing is that it's pissing me off. not the whole teenage crush thing or even that i think he's hot (yes alex i know you're probably like "um no he isn't" but it's THE DAMN EYES I TELL YOU), but that i think of him when i don't see him and i get all pissy when i do see him. so my reaction is (almost just like it always is) that i could give a fuck about him. really. well not really (see now i'm away from him so naturally i'm thinking of him). but i just really hate it. yeah, i think that's accurate.

you know for some weird reason i think people think i'm a lesbian. like, oh god who was i talking to, oh anyway i was talking to one of my friends a while ago and i was like "yeah that guy is really hot... mmm yeah i'd hit that in a minute" and they (it was a group) looked at me and were like "really??! we've never heard you talk about guys before..."

yeah. i think they seriously thought i was into chicks. and for the record i'm not. i have no desire to be with a chick. for me it would just be soo... weird and ... well weird, you know? (that was addressed to all the straight people out there). and let me also say this: i have absolutely nothing against gay/bi people. i could get more into this issue but i don't really want to right now.

so yeah what's been weirding me out is that i haven't stopped thinking about this one guy i used to know. well i guess he was like one of my best friends. so yeah for like a week i've been thinking of him. and if i wasn't so convinced that everyone in mowaque hates me i would call him up. well not really, i don't know his number, but i could find it out.

anyway yeah. guys. we've got them all figured out, but the damn thing is that we're the quirky moody ones.

that's right. i used the word moody. any more of my friends want to stop talking to me?

huh?

huh?

yeah i thought it was just her too.

woah i just re-read this post... it's really wandering... so back to him. i've given up. which is weird 'cause technically i never tried, but yeah. i'm moving on. sure, i still have that moment of "oh my god" when i see him, but i can ignore it better now. so yeah no more talking about him. ever!

aaaahhhh again i come here to post and instead i rant.

mmm you know who's hot... aaron... yeah i thought that died too...